Yes, I’m a drama queen. And I’m better at it than most, so trying to draw me into your drama won’t work because I’m gonna make some drama of my own that will out-drama anything your little peewee brain can conjure up.

Another relative is in the hospital. I cannot and will not deal with another death in the family right now. I don’t give one good goddamn how many cigarettes he smokes and how fast he kills himself, but when this addiction is hurting other people I love, then this drama queen is about to rain some hell fire on his stupid ass.

His children – a few of them – are masters at broadcasting their badasserie. I find this amusing. If you’re really all that badass, you don’t have to advertise. I’m expecting that I will have to take on a couple of them in the near future. Part of me is looking forward to it, part of me is tired. Will they never learn?

Today’s drama was the eating of the mattress cover by one bored puppy, who was out of my sight for one freakin minute. This is getting old. I spent 1/2 hour sewing on a patch because I really don’t want to buy another mattress cover. Someone spent that 1/2 hour in his crate, and apparently we both need needed a nap – I curled up on the bed and woke up 2 hours later, not having heard a sound from said bored puppy.

Yesterday was a day with puppy snuggles and sweet kisses. Today was eating stuff, tearing stuff up, tug of war with the leash. Yesterday I could see the dog he’s gonna be – today I could see the puppy I’ll miss. As trying as it can be (and is) I know I’ll look back and smile. And when the day comes that his face turns white, I’ll remember and miss these days.

I’m missing Max a lot this week. It’s been a year since he got sick, a year since I knew that the days were short, and it hurts as much now as it did the day I said goodbye. Tomorrow I will tell Maverick the story of Max and Mommy, and the story of Maverick and Mommah. Memories will make me smile, and we’ll make some more.

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