Fear and loathing

Trigger warning – I use the f word a lot in this post. (sorry)

I’ve been trying to write something for over a week and I just can’t seem to get past a few paragraphs. Most days I walk around going “What the ACTUAL fuck is going on?” I mutter to myself a lot more than I used to, and I’ve pretty much had an ongoing conversation with myself since before I learned to talk.

So there was an “election.” I put that in quotes because, seriously, what the actual fuck WAS that hot mess? The term “shit show” frequently comes to mind. We’ve got states that can’t count, people not being allowed to observe counts, ballots being tossed, people voting for only one person on the whole ballot, vote counts suddenly being changed in the middle of the night, boxes of ballots appearing as if by magic, and a whole crap ton of dead people walking from the cemetery to vote for someone who often looks like he’s about to join them.

We have the media declaring a winner. Umm, who gave them that power? I thought the people elected a president, I wasn’t aware that the media selected a president. BUT, Goddess forfend you say that out loud! We’re being told to shut up, accept the “results,” and oh, by the way, you racist, stupid, uneducated, deplorable, chumps – wanna be friends?

What.

The.

Actual.

Fuck?

I was unfriended by someone I’ve known for a long time, someone who used to call me and threaten suicide on a regular basis while deep in drug addiction, someone I talked off the ledge countless times over the years. Why? Because I asked her to answer a question without mentioning Trump. (The question, which I have asked of many, was “what would you do if some strange man came up behind your daughter and sniffed her shoulders and hair?” My answer is that he would picking himself up off the floor.) Her response was to tell me that I was stupid and she couldn’t respect me because I don’t hate President Trump. Yeah, so much for that. (She did mention that I was educated but apparently that has not effected my stupidity cuz you gotta be stoopid to git that masters digree in accountin. I is edamakaded!

If I won a contest, and half the people involved in choosing the winner accused me of cheating, I would want to prove to them that no, I did NOT cheat, I won fair and square. Nope, not gonna have that this time – shut up, you racist bigot and hey, wanna be friends? Cuz I really want to be your friend, right after I put you on the list of people who should never be allowed to hold a job again. K? C’mon, man!

What.

The.

Actual.

Fuck?

Meanwhile, in the spirit of “nothing to see here, watch my other hand!” Covid cases are conveniently increasing and hysteria is mounting. Because we’ve proved that shut downs work SO well (heavy sarcasm), hey, let’s try that again! And by the way, you need to start doing what you’re told. Because GOD DAMN IT, you’re trying to kill GRANDMA again!

Sometimes I think I’m living in an alternate universe. In my world, we’re going about our lives and taking the normal precautions we would during flu season – other than the hated masks. I read a lot, and I think that even though I’m a stupid deplorable racist, I can figure out what I should believe, what I should toss, and what I should consider further. I was asked why the “anti-maskers” think those who religiously wear them love them. Gee, I dunno, maybe cuz you preach to us all the time?

One of my friends went to DC the other day for the rally to support the president. She said it was a happy, peaceful day, she made new friends, felt a great sense of how good this country really is. She got out of DC before dark, before Antifa (which is only an idea, remember) and BLM started randomly beating people up. If you follow only main stream media, you probably wouldn’t know about that. You also wouldn’t know about Dominion and that there are multiple affidavits affirming voting issues.

It’s okay. I think that breathing sand might be fun. I guess if you stick your head far enough down that tunnel, it all seems okay.

And because I cannot figure out what the actual fuck is going on, I’m going to go on living my life. If our governor tries to lock us down again, I will simply ignore him in the same way he ignores me. I will pray for a resolution to the election debacle – and if CreepySnifferMan is finally declared the winner, well, he’ll never be my president unless he agrees to an investigation into this mess and proves that he actually did win fairly, but he’ll still be CreepySnifferMan in my eyes. (I put up with four years of Orange Man Bad, deal with it). And I’ll go work on a quilt for the new baby born to the young couple down the road, and planning all kinds of fun things for the new baby to be born in our “family” this Spring, when my BFF becomes a grandma for the first time.

This child to come is already surrounded by so much love that all the rest of the fuckery is forgotten in the joy of an ultrasound picture of a tiny baby foot.

This entry was posted in Corona virus, family, fear, my life, old friends, politics and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

14 Responses to Fear and loathing

  1. In challenging times like these we must all remember the stirring words of the great philosopher Rodney King, “Can’t we all just get along?” /s Seems we all want to punch somebody’s lights out. Well, except for Peachy. We all like Peachy.

    Liked by 1 person

    • everyone loves Peachy – anyone who doesn’t is just Satan. Although I have to tell you, she is a terrible enabler of my book buying addiction. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      • If you gotta have a monkey on your back, book buying is a pretty darn good choice. Do you Kindle?

        Liked by 1 person

      • I got a Kindle when they first were introduced and I think I’m on my fifth – I use them a lot. I like my paper books too, and I use the library as well. I learned to read when I was only four years old and nothing has stopped me since. I think my first library card was issued to me when I was 5. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • I’m totally hooked on Kindle. I have an older Fire model that probably has 350+ books on it and that understates its use because I signed up for the $9.95/mo Kindle Unlimited that lets me “borrow and read” an unlimited number of books per month without purchasing. I don’t like TV so in the evenings my habit is to read.

        Liked by 1 person

      • my Kindle Fire won’t charge and it really annoys me because I loved that one. I tried the Unlimited but I didn’t read enough in a month to justify it most months.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Also, the really desirable books don’t get on Unlimited until way past their publication date. You have to weed through a lot to find the better reads. One Kindle feature I love is the “dark screen” mode/ I read in bed after the AJF goes to sleep and being able to effectively read in the dark is a plus for us both.

        Liked by 1 person

      • I read during supper. Bear reads the paper and I read the Kindle. RIght now I just don’t have much time. So the TBR piles grows and it’s all Peachy’s fault.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. ekurie says:

    Refreshing to read so much common sense. I ignored our governors orders too.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I worry about small businesses, who can’t afford to shut down but can’t afford the fines that will be levied if they disobey. I don’t know the answer, but I know that something is definitely going on that’s more than an illness that has a 99% survival rate.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Did you see the letter signed by both Elizabeth Warren and Amy Klobuchar about the Dominion machines in 2019? I’ll bet you have but most people haven’t. The thing I miss most as I get older is an unbiased press. It’s so hard to hold a conversation with someone who holds an opposing view when the “facts” differ based on which news channel is watched.
    Please know you aren’t alone shaking your head wondering WTF is going on in this through the looking glass world.

    Liked by 2 people

    • I did, I also so an NPR interview where they talked about the voting machines being so easy to hack, heard an interview with the Lt. Governor of Texas about a presentation given where one of the machines broke down and couldn’t be fixed and another took hours, while one of his aides plugged in his cell phone to another machine and downloaded all the data. There is no longer a “conversation” and hasn’t been for four years. People can blame President Trump for that – I blame a lot of people, but he ain’t of them

      Liked by 2 people

  4. Bitey Dog says:

    Darn. My “Like” button doesn’t work. Wish I could give you 100 likes…and some books. 📚 📖

    Liked by 1 person

    • you wouldn’t believe the size of my TBR pile. There are 4 books on the table beside me, one more in front of me, two beside that one, probably 50 on the dry sink next to me. And that’s just this room. But I love you for the offer. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

speak to me!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.