Reproductive rights

Posted on September 2, 2024 by suziecreamcheese

I admit to being confused about this, I’m not sure who is taking away anyone’s right to reproduce.

I’m old enough to remember when there were only a few methods of birth control. Rhythm – which we joked about. “You know what they call people who use the rhythm method? Parents.” or the guy pulling out – and that one didn’t work any better than the other one. And then in the 70’s along came IUD’s and the pill and holy cow, no one really had to get pregnant if she didn’t want to.

(Please don’t think I don’t realize there are moronic men who want their women barefoot and pregnant, and there are cases of rape, and there are cases where it is indeed a health issue. These cases are a totally different thing from using abortion as birth control)

I’m from a generation who viewed getting pregnant outside of marriage as something not very desirable. Most of the time, and no, I don’t have statistics, but my experience showed that most of the time, the guy and the girl got married. If the girl had a reputation, then maybe she went away for a few months and came back a bit thinner, and no one really talked about that – except in whispers. Getting pregnant unmarried was definitely not something to be celebrated.

Birth control gave women the ability to have sex any old time and not have to worry about getting pregnant. It also gave guys the ability to screw ’em and walk away. Somehow, women got the idea that having multiple partners with no consequences to anyone was a really great idea. Young men, who essentially think with their dicks, also thought it was a great idea.

This was the “freedom” that came with birth control

Yes, people made mistakes. Women, girls, got pregnant. I went to college with a girl with got drunk, slept with a couple of guys in the same night, and ended up pregnant. Abortion was a new thing – well, not new, but newly legal in NY. We sent her off to the City to get this done, and she was honestly devasted by the whole experience. There was no “shout your abortion” or celebrities extolling the virtues of sleeping around and damn the consequences.

I don’t think sex is something to view with shame. I think it’s something that should be a loving expression of committment to your partner – the one you share your life with, not the one you share the evening with.

Call me old fashioned but I miss the days when people didn’t tell you who they wanted to screw before they told you their names.

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It’s Netflix time

Posted on August 22, 2024 by suziecreamcheese

I never was interested in politics, really, till DJT came down the escalator – I turned to the Bear and said, “He’s gonna win this thing” and when the media went nuts about what a horrible person this previously beloved reality star was, I started to pay more attention.

Covid woke up the small part of me that still trusted the media, science, pharma and government.

That said, one more campaign commercial and I’m about to throw the TV over the front bank. Well, Bear would have quite the fit if I did that, so there’s that, but it’s close. Might be worth it if I didn’t know he’d just go buy another one.

Please, you want me to vote for you? Stop lying and stop being assholes. Also, one ad a day and a box of government cheese a month, and I might be bought. (It’s known as “gubbmint cheese” and if you’ve never had it, you’re lucky to not know anyone who needs help with food, but oh you’ve missed some of the best cheese ever.) (We’re not getting it, a friend is)

So, much as I hate their political leanings, it’s Netflix for me till November. Umbrella Academy is my current evening fare. I know there are other streaming services, but I really don’t watch enough TV, nor does Bear, to justify paying for anything beyond Dish Network. (I wouldn’t even pay for that but Bear needs his ancient bad shows)

So if you have any suggestions for Netflix series, drop them below.

In other news, tomorrow is Bear’s birthday. I’m making him a Boston Cream Pie. The cake is baking and once cool, I’ll make the filling. I’m not quite sure I have enough milk so that may require a trip to the grocery store. I will not be indulging in this creation, by the way, too many calories!

I’m one third of the way through the 5th Cormoran Strike novel – this one is over 900 pages long! I was told that I need to read Louise Penny – so once I’m through all the rest of the books I need to read, I’ll start on that series.

And that’s all, folks

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Walking

Posted on August 18, 2024 by suziecreamcheese

Back awhile ago, I weighed a whole lot more than I liked. I managed to knock off a good deal of weight by walking every day, miles and miles every day. I whined about it a lot but I honestly enjoyed it most of the time – the day of the gustnado when I nearly got blown into the field, was soaked through in an instant and thought I was going to land in Oz (which wouldn’t be so awful, I’m a good witch, but still) – was not one of my favorites, although I’ve gotten a good bit of mileage out of the story of that experience.

Then along came Maverick. Mr Tiny Terror did not take kindly to spending hours in a crate while Mommah walked for 3 hours alone. He wasn’t able to go more than a mile – if that – guilt set in and I stopped going for my long walks daily. I went from 5 miles to 3, then to 2. By then he was able to go that far, but loose leash walking is an art I’ve yet to master with Maverick. (I never managed it with Max, either).

And then my back got the stupids, and all bets were off. So the pounds have taken the opportunity to take up residence on my hips once again – not as many but more than I like.

I know how to fix it. I just need to do it. So the “eat less, walk more” program starts anew. It’s too hot still for Maverick to go far, but once it cools off, he can easily do 3 miles with me. I just need to figure out this loose leash thing.

Yesterday some guy posted a video on Twitter (X) of J.D. vance getting on a plane with his GSD. I seriously want to meet the person who trained that dog! He had one finger loosely hooked in the loop of the leash. ONE FLIPPIN FINGER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The comments were priceless, the original poster (Took me ages to figure out that “OP” meant “original poster” by the way) was not a fan and stated that anyone could see “that guy never walked a dog before.” He got schooled. Probably didn’t listen, but at any rate. The dog, I believe his name is Atlas, is beautiful and very well trained. Pretty sure he won’t go around biting any Secret Service men! (Or women) (That’s a topic for another day)

Our walk today was not an example of good loose leash walking. However, we aren’t as bad as we used to be and that’s something. The only real pulling was when he insisted on going to say hi to two boys, probably 10 – 12 years old. Yeah, he’s my social butterfly at times.

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Things that are annoying me today

Posted on August 9, 2024 by suziecreamcheese
  1. Tampons. Can we please go back to a time when such things were not discussed in polite company? No woman, and I swear by that statement, wants to make it public that she has her period. No woman. And I don’t mean someone who “identifies as” a woman, trust me, if you’re a guy who thinks you want to have periods – I had cramps that would put me in bed for a couple of days, so you’re welcome to that shit.

2. I was not aware that one could choose to stop menstruating. (Yes, I know, I don’t want to talk about this but I’m doing it anyway because…..) Apparently one can take endless birth control pills and never have a period. Is this possibly healthy

3. Wegovy commercials. They are right up there with Jardiance commercials. Maybe spend money on teaching people how to lose weight in a healthy manner instead of having them dance around singing an obnoxious song?

4. Why in the heck are the soaps so dumb? Really, is it necessary to turn Hope into a Brooke Jr? And why is Katy being such a snit about Poppy? geesh!

5. Why in the heck would someone who served 24 years in the military – something to be proud of – choose to lie and embellish that record, knowing full well that the truth was bound to come out?

6. Why the heck can’t I get a straight answer about my future at the college? Sent one last email today and hopefully I’ll get an answer. And then I can plan for the rest of my life.

7. Why are people starting to talk about Fall and Halloween already? Can we please enjoy the Summer while it lasts?

8. Can we bring back public shaming? Blue hair looks stupid. Nose rings make you look like an animal that needs to be led around. Stop it, you look ridiculous.

9. Can we get back to basics in school and stop all the nonsense? We really don’t need drag shows in kindergarten, and if you want to take your child to one, you should be visited by CPS. Or some old fashioned grandmothers.

10. Why am I so bloody shy that I really hate trying anything new or doing anything new and my default is to say no. (Peachy will laugh at this one but it’s really true, I have to make myself say yes to things)

11 Why is it so difficult to decide what to have for lunch?

12. Why are there so many books and so little time? And so little room in my house for more? Why do I have so much yarn?

13. Why do people cancel stuff on the threat of bad weather – when it’s 24 hours or more away? Maverick is home today, mostly because no one else was coming for daycare so if he has no friends to play with, he may as well stay home. And we’re meant to get thunderstorms so he’ll be hiding upstairs with me.

14 why do so many things annoy me? 🙂

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what the heck?

Posted on August 2, 2024 by suziecreamcheese

So a couple of weeks ago, I was happily reading on my front porch, when I got a frantic message from a friend telling me that former President Trump had been shot. I dashed into the house to watch it unfold on live TV. I was, and still am,horrified. Love him or hate him, no one deserves to be shot over politics. What the heck did they think would be the outcome of this had it succeeded in killing him? I’ve seen a lot of opinions, ranging from “the right would do nothing” to “it would start a civil war.” I’m somewhere in the middle of that, I doubt that people who love him would actually do nothing, but civil war? No, we’re not that far gone. Yet.

I saw a lot of people being excoriated for wishing the shooter had better aim. Not only is that a pretty horrible thing to say, it’s a pretty stupid thing to say on social media. Keep your opinions to yourselves and you’ll stay out of a lot of trouble.

And in a matter of days, we had one candidate shot and another withdraw from the race. Well, it wasn’t much of a race with him in it, more like a slow creep. Anyone who can claim with a straight face that they didn’t know for a long time that Biden was not firing on all cylinders, is lying to themselves, and to you. And that includes all the news media, and the currently annointed candidate for the Democrat party.

This leads me to a couple of things. One, who is actually in charge here? If we get attacked, is Joe sleeping or is he capable of ordering a defense? If he’s too old and incapacitated to campaign, is he really capable of being President? Also, did the people who voted in the primary vote for Joe or for Kamalama-DingDong? I would be seriously pissed if my vote was just tossed out like so much garbage and someone was just chosen in the place of the winner! If the Orioles won the World Series and couldn’t make the victory parade, would we allow another team to just take the title and the laps? Dear Lord, how can anyone see this as okay?

Also, is no one else concerned that she went from basically a desk ornament to the most wonderful Vice President ever, in the matter of a few days? And we’re being fed a steady diet of “don’t believe what you know to be true, trust us when we tell you she was NEVER called the border Czart!’ I fear for this country, I really do!

I’m rereading Hillbilly Elegy – I read it when it first was published and liked it, I have it on Kindle so I reloaded it and started it the other day. I also watched the movie last weekend after learning that it existed. (The book is a lot better) i belong to a book group on Facebook and one member posted that she was reading the book. Oh, the comments! According to a certain group – probably all crazy cat ladies (that’s a joke, people) totally slammed the book as nothing but lies. I don’t normally engage but I was possessed by a couple of beers and decided to play. I commented that he was simple “speaking his truth.” I was told he wasn’t really a Hillbilly at all, and I said, ‘Well maybe he identifies as one! ” Seriously, I thought about their claims that people who lived in the area he writes about have said it’s lies, and thought “well, they don’t come off really well so maybe you should consider that.” My older sister has told me more than once that my memories of certain events are completely false. So who’s right? It’s possible she is, but equally possible that I am. I’m pretty sure that if I wrote a book about the town where I grew up – a small town in Upstate NY – most of the inhabitants would swear that certain events never happened, that I was never treated like that, that I was totally lying! I should probably do it just to prove my point, but I’m too lazy! (In case you didn’t know, this is the book J.D. Vance wrote about his life growing up in Appalachia)

In Maverick news, there’s a puppy at daycare who is looking and smelling so mighty fine that all the boys are feeling funny in their pants. Yeah, it’s a joy to have an intact male dog when there’s a female close by in heat. She’s a little Olde English Bulldogge, and I am totally in love with her brother, however that is not a breed I could handle. I have enough trouble with a Golden Retriever! Maverick is not currently very happy with Mommah, my back has made it difficult to take him for a walk so on weekends, we spend as much time as we can outside – and the heat has made that difficult as well. I love the heat, but I’m not wearing a fur coat outside. Or inside, for that matter. 🙂 So we muddle along, training is not going to happen when he’s not thinking with his brain, distractions are not working, his Miss Humpy Pillow is getting a workout and my nerves are stlightly frazzled – but that’s why there’s booze in this house!

My back seems to actually be getting better. I purchased a grounding mat – after doing some reading about Earthing, I decided it was worth a shot. Is it helping? I dunno, when I get up in the morning, it doesn’t seem to take as long to loosen up as it did before. I’ll continue to use it and let you know if it’s just my imagination or if there’s something to this.

But wait, there’s more! I saw the surgeon today and he thinks it’s not time for an operation, so there will be another round of shots in my future. I’m okay with that, the thought of surgery was not one I wished to entertain.

And what are we reading, aside from Hillbilly Elegy? The Dream and the Nightmare, about how programs aimed at helping most often make things worse – a bit dated but still valid. Cormoran Strike #3, as soon as the library gets it back in stock. And I think I’ll reread The Parasitic Mind by Gad Saad. He’s a bit of a character but the book is very good, read it awhile ago and I feel like I need to revisit it.

I really need to get back to blogging more often!

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The annual pilgrimage

Posted on June 16, 2024 by suziecreamcheese

And catching up

Where to start? I’m in NY for my annual pilgrimage to see old friends and visit dead relatives. This trip has been planned for months and almost canceled several times. The first “I’m not going” occured when I discovered that I haven’t been assigned any classes for Fall. While I’ve been planning on retiring at some point, that point was meant to be a few years from now, when our mortgage was paid off. The motel where I stay has raised prices – hasn’t everything gone up? (Let’s go Brandon) and I didn’t think I could justify spending the money when I will soon not have an income aside from Social Security. (Yes, I’m that old)

Bear chose to differ with that decision. He has assured me that although we will have to tighten our belts a bit – translated to “no more random shopping trips for shit I don’t need” – we will be fine with the money he makes. I’m thinking about what I’d like to do. I’m honestly tired of teaching. No, that’s not true. I love teaching, I’m tired of students who need to be bottle fed and have their hands held through every step and are incapable of figuring anything out on their own. I’m tired of academic politics and having to bite my tongue for fear of offending someone with koolaid dyed hair. I’m tired of being afraid to post that because I might lose my job. So I’m thinking about going private – private tutoring pays well and I wouldn’t have to deal with anyone I don’t like. We’ll see, nothing will be decided till I get back from NY

The second almost cancellation occured when I got out of bed on Thursdy morning and couldn’t put weight on my right leg without screaming in pain. I have a low pain threshold but this was excruciating – on a scale of 1-10, this was a 15. This was “I’ve been kicked in the crotch and then set on fire” level of pain. I somehow managed to get Maverick to daycare, then fell on the floor and tried my back exercises, after messaging my chiropractor for an emergency adjustment. He asked if I could be there at 2:30. I could have been there in 5 minutes! By the time 2:30 rolled around, a shower and a few ibuprofen had eased the pain back to manageable, I could walk upright although with a noticeable limp, He said something about twisted vertebrae, beat me up and sent me off.

I babied myself for the rest of the day. Bear packed the car and let me nap. I went to bed at 10 pm – my normal is 1 am. Got up in the morning and was able to walk relatively pain free so I headed out at 10. And for some reason, although i know how to get from my house to this motel, I chose to follow Siri’s directions and ended up adding an hour to the drive. It was an adventure! I went through towns I’d never visited in all the years I lived here!

That evening was pizza was one nephew, the next day was a birthday party for another nephew. Sunday was lunch with the oldest nephew, and Monday I spend the day with an old friend, who sent me off with several designer handbags that her deceased daughter had collected over the years – she could have sold them for a good chunk of money but wanted to give them to someone who would use them. She also gave me a really cute hat that had belonged to the same daughter. We laughed and talked all afternoon, I came home with a heart overflowing and a smile that wouldn’t quit.

Tuesday was a visit to my sister, office hour, late lunch, and class this evening. I’m tired! Something is planned for every day and I’m not used to being so on the go. I’m giving myself the evenings to decompress. Netflix and crochet, totally necessary.

Wednesday was a search for my cousin’s grave – we didn’t find it but we did find my aunt and uncle, so that was mostly a success. Thursday was a 150 mile drive to have lunch with a friend, give her a ton of yarn, and then drive 150 miles back to the motel. I hadn;t slept well, so that was followed by a two hour nap.,

Friday was lunch with a favorite cousin, then a trip to Walmart for socks – because apparently I can’t count.

Today I visited the rest of the cemeteries, had a good talk with my parents, and my grandparents, and got seriously annoyed at the state of my maternal parents’ graves. One cousin chose to plant a bunch of crap around their headstone, it badly needs weeding and I didn’t bring tools with me to take care of that. There are a plethora of cousins in this area, someone could get off their ass and do it. Then I had dinner with a favorite nephew and said “see you next year.”

Tomorrow is a visit with an old friend, my annual tarot reading from a dear friend, and finally home on Monday. I am so ready. While it’s been nice to have a break from daily stuff, I’m ready for home. A good cup of coffee, a shower in my own bahroom and a good night’s sleep in my own bed – sounds like a slice of Heaven.

I am so very grateful for the blessings in my life – my friends and family here, and my friends and family at home. I have more than I deserve and I am well and truly blessed

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Venting

Posted on April 19, 2024 by suziecreamcheese

I, like a lot of people, have a dog who pulls on leash. I also have a dog who has a very high prey drive, and a ton of energy. And I swear he has ADHD. Teaching him to walk nicely on leash has been a work in progress for all the days he’s lived with me. We walked every day, miles, at the park before he started daycare. We still walk miles every weekend. His pulling has improved tremendously. Yes, he still drags me to some things – but I’ve also learned, and I know the signs that say he’s about to go and I adjust for it. What fun is a walk if you just plod along and never stop to sniff?

People are judgy – I have shed many tears because of looks we’ve gotten at the park. The day he got the zoomines on leash and spun me in circles (in his defense, he was only 6 months old) and I couldn’t stop laughing, well, a lot of Karens felt it necessary to voice their disapproval. There have been days when he has practically ripped my arm out, and my shoulders are paying the price still. GIving me looks of disdain while you pass with your doodle on a flexi-lead, and make snide comments about how I should take a training class are not in the least helpful

I’ve been working on telling myself that the only opinion that matters is mine, the only one who knows how hard we’ve worked and how far we’ve come is me and the only one who has a right to criticize is Maverick. (He frequently tells me exactly what I’m doing wrong)

Last night two people felt it necessary to comment, “Looks like HE’S walking YOU!” I refrained from saying, “looks like you bellied up to the buffet one too many times” because that would be rude. I did, however, say quietly “you have no idea how much work we’ve done and how far we’ve come.” The first one stared at me like I had insulted her mightily. (I think the buffet comment would have been more insulting, personally) The second one said, “you mean he used to be WORSE?”

I admit it, I cried when we got to the car. We had completed our walk with the leash mostly hanging loose and at no time was there tension, even when Maverick was ahead of me. And yet, those two comments ate at me.

I read a lot of dog training books. I probably own more than some professional trainers. Maverick has been my challenge, and my partner, since the day we brought him home. He has taught me way more about not only dogs, but about myself, than I ever thought was possible. He is not some placid little doodle (who, by the way, are mostly batshit crazy) he has a big personality and he will let you know exactly how he feels in any given situation. He cannot be forced to do what he doesn’t want to do, and you better have a damned good explanation for why you want him to do something.

Does that mean I have conversations with him? Well, yes I do, but not about what I want him to do. I tell him by the way I react, and by the rewards he gets.

We have become quite enamored of clicker training, both of us – because I can tell him quickly when he did something right, and he knows right away that that’s what I wanted. People find it necessary to tell me that it’s much better to use “fill in the blank” training methods. Hey, if you want to use a shock collar or a prong collar, be my guest, but keep that shit away from my dog. I may look like a bumbling fool when we’re out in public, but trust me, I do know a bit.

And I thank Maverick for that. If only he could read the books! Hey, maybe I should read them to him!

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I got shot in the back

Posted on April 11, 2024 by suziecreamcheese

and I lived to tell the tale

Seriously. I got cortisone shots in my back this morning. Again. This is my fourth round with these shots and they’re losing their efficacy each time. This round was in a different spot – I have no clue about the L’s they throw around, L2, L3, doodah, doodah! My doctor said this area had gotten worse so it could be why the previous shots weren’t working so well. I pray she’s correct.

Today I have a different doctor. I was quite determined not to like him because he’s not my normal doctor. I adore my normal doctor. However, she chose to have a baby and deliver last month – how rude! So she’s out on maternity leave and I had to have a sub. In spite of my determination, he was actually very good. I still prefer my normal doctor but he’ll do.

One of the warnings you’re given with these shots is that it often gets worse before it gets better. Hi, that would be me! This aftenoon I have to teach a class – yes, I’m blogging and teaching at the same time – (they’re in groups together in breakout rooms, settle down) – which means I’m sitting in front of the computer. It’s a lucky thing it’s work together day, because I can get up and walk around as often as needed. I doubt, however, I will be able to quilt this afternoon. Oh well, I’ll make up for it tomorrow. I’m also making love to my ice pack. 🙂

Not only am I blogging while teaching, I’m watching the most recent school board meeting. We’re facing a huge budget deficit and the solution being proposed by some is to withdraw money from the fund balance. I’m not clear on what this “fund balance” actually is, but I’m going to learn more. Why? Apparently this fund balance earns interest at the rate of 5% – I’m pretty sure this is an annual rate. It seems that several board members, and members of the community, do not understand the concept of time value of money. No, you won’t just be pulling $5,000, 000 from the fund, you will be pulling the interest on $5,000,000 forever. I’m considering going to the next meeting and giving a short lecture on this concept.

No one in the audience wants to make any cuts, because everyone’s child is going to be the next NFL (or whatever sport) superstar. Hate to break it to them, no he or she won’t. There is an incredible amount of waste going on in the school – my husband works there and the stories he tells just make me shake my head. Any real discussion of budget cuts is met with “that’s nickel and dime stuff!” Someone needs to say that when you save nickels and dimes, you eventually get dollars. It’s extremely frustrating. So I’m thinking – should I stay home because I may well lose my temper with their bullheadedness – or should I go and try to educate some people?

In other news – we have another great grandson, who arrived on Tuesday. I am still knitting the sweater I started over a month ago – I haven’t had to rip something so many times in years! It’s an awfully badly written pattern and I’m at the point of just doing it my way and hoping for the best. I’m the only knitter in the family, no one will ever notice!

sidenote – cortisone shots can give a headache and yup, I got that too.

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Tired

Posted on April 4, 2024 by suziecreamcheese

I haven’t slept well for the past couple of nights. Why, you ask? I’ve been waking up every hour to go pee. The deal with my bladder is that I need to drink lots of water. That also helps with muscle spasms, by the way. The problem is, no matter how much I go before bed, something kicks into overdrive when I fall asleep and an hour later, I’m up and visiting Uncle John.

Today I planned to sew some half square triangles because I’m currently obsessed with them, press and topstitch key fobs and maybe go for a walk later. Instead, I think I’ll be taking a nap.

In other news, I’m currently reading Imagine Heaven, a book about near death experiences. This topic has always fascinated me. I’m also reading American Muckraker, and a couple of dog training books. My sweet Peachy got me some transparent sticky notes and a way cool pen for Christmas, so my dog training books are now bristling with notes. Yes, I have fun with pen and paper.

Easter was quiet here. Just me the Bear and the Maverick, a huge ham and a big bowl of corn. There is a plethora of ham left over so there will be bean soup in the crock pot tomorrow. Bear and his son love my ham and bean soup, such a simple food that brings so much pleasure to the people I love – so I’ll make a huge batch so some can be frozen and some can be shared. There is so much ham that I’ll be making ham and green beans next week. There will be enough of that to share as well.

The monster quilt top is complete and I found fabric for the back. Hopefully today I will sew the backing to fit and get it all layered with the batting. Crawling around on the floor pinning will mean I have to go whine about how much my back hurts later. The sweater that I started for the great grandchild who’s due to make his arrival in 3 weeks is being frogged. I dropped a stitch about 4 rows in, and this pattern isn’t one that will allow it to just be woven back up. Of course not, this pattern is doing battle with me every step. Christmas pinwheel blocks are sewn and being squared, and a bunch of puppy pinwheel blocks are about to be squared up as well. The sewing machine is humming these days, and I’m loving it. I’ve made about a thousand wristlet key fobs and I’ve decided to give it a shot at selling them on Etsy. When I open the shop, I’ll make an announcement here. It’s not a terribly user friendly interface, but I’ll figure it out. I’m thinking I’ll list my bracelets as well. I don’t expect to get rich but it would be nice to have some extra money to buy yarn. (That’s a joke, I’m one ball of yarn away from my own episode of Hoarders)

We got to see the first great grandson the day before Easter. Maverick was, to put it mildly, batshit crazy. He was completely over the top, almost knocked my granddaughter down, tore a hole in the netting on the PackNPlay and ended up relegated to the front porch, where he barked nonstop for over an hour. So. Mommah had a long talk with herself and realized that changes need to be made, this chaos can’t go on. I’m working on a “lesson plan.” Last night when I picked him up from daycare, his usual “dash out the door and body slam Mommah” move was cut short by me turning my back, and the owner – who is also a trainer – turning him around and taking him back inside. On the fourth try, he sat nicely beside her until she released him to me, and then he sat nicely beside me while we talked. Self control is the name of this game, Maverick and you will become a master at it if it kills me. ***

The bay, our first great grandchild, is 6 months old. We’ve only seen him a few times, but I think he likes me. He stole my glasses and put his fingers in my mouth – something only one other child has ever done. And then he fell asleep in my arms and slept for nearly two hours. Was my arm broken? Well, yes it was. Did I mind? Hell no I did not.

In other news, since this has taken me too long to finish, Maverick is doing very well with polite greetings! His norm has been to bodyslam me when he comes through the office door for pickup from daycare. On Monday, it took four times till he sat patiently and waited for me to take his leash, and then sat beside me for a good ten minutes. Tuesday it took 2 times for this to happen. Last night it happened on the first try, but he had to try again because of demand barking – nope, not putting up with that either. Holy cow, he really CAN practice self control!

I’m reading a book called As A Dog Thinketh, which has a daily passage about training and living with dogs. Yesterday’s made me think of a fellow blogger – about how you feel when you have to let a dog go who only wants to bite you. It’s a very nice book, I’m enjoying my daily read.

***(DIsclaimer: I rarely get serious here and I hope you all understand how much i love this dog. He saved my life when he was a puppy and I was so deep in mourning Max that I could barely get out of bed each day. I will do anything for him. And therein lies the rub. He is spoiled to the point where he’s out of control. He’s a teenager demanding the damned car keys and telling his parents to shut up and don’t even think about imposing a curfew. It has to stop. My body has taken a toll and it’s not fun. There will be no drastic measures, but there will be enforcement of rules and a great deal more training. Nope, you’re not getting the keys to the Mercedes, kid, even though it is technically your car)

Posted in dogs, Maverick, my life, training | Tagged , , , | 14 Comments

Neutering – or “it’s a choice”

Posted on March 14, 2024 by suziecreamcheese

https://www.akcchf.org/educational-resources/library/articles/an-update-on-the-health.html

https://www.ucdavis.edu/news/when-should-you-neuter-your-dog-avoid-health-risks

https://www.veterinary-practice.com/article/effects-of-neutering-on-undesirable-behaviours-in-dogs

About 15 years ago, we got a Golden Retriever. Knowing next to nothing about dogs, and totally nothing about Goldens except that my brother in law had one, and that dog hated kids – since I’m not a fan of most children, I thought it was perfect. (Yeah, who knew that they’re kid magnets?)

We looked in the newspaper for “puppies for sale” ads, found one close by, went to visit – total back yard breeder and not the best kind, but again, we knew nothing – and played with all the puppies. One little fat guy stole my heart, but wouldn’t stay on my lap. One little golden guy crawled into my lap, put his head on my chest and the rest was history. I handed him to Bear, he put his head on Bear’s chest and the deed was done. We brought him home a week later, I have no recollection of that drive except that he was on my lap the entire time and I never took my eyes off him.

He was an amazing puppy. Incredibly calm, an old soul, loved everyone and opened my world. Bear worked nights, so Max and I were mostly alone, just the two of us. He went everywhere with me, even went to school with me and slept under my desk while I taught.

And then he layed down in the flower bed one morning and wouldn’t get up. Our last journey began – one of chemo and sickness and begging him to eat something and please, please God, let me have one more day with him.

Max was neutered at 6 months. The prevailing wisdom was, and still is, that the earlier the neuter, the better. It will solve all your problems and give you the perfect dog.

What they don’t tell you, you can read some of in the links above. It quite often makes behavior problems worse. Sure, it stops some of need to pee on every stick in the world, and maybe keeps the dog from roaming – although Max decided to go visit the neighbors every time their female was in heat. The paragraph about aggression in the third study is quite revealing. They also don’t tell you that in some breeds – Goldens being one of them – it greatly increases the chances of certain cancers. Can we say hemangio? Yes, we can – said it way too many times.

Hemangiosarcoma is one of the nastier cancers out there. There are no symptoms. By the time you realize your dog is sick, there’s pretty much nothing you can do but give them some weeks of joy and let them go peacefully.

There are things I can’t forgive myself for. Among them are neutering Max at 6 months. I chose to put him through chemo because I was ready to move Heaven and earth to cure him. I didn’t cure him. I put him through 6 weeks of sickness and confusion. I know, I did the best I could. I will never do that again, but was that lesson worth it?

Anyway. When he died, I was lost. My heart was completely shattered – 6 years later, I’m sobbing as I write this. Along came Maverick. He brought laughter to a home that had been bleak and dark for 3 months. I will always be grateful to him, even when he makes me want to strangle him. 🙂

I will not make the same mistakes with him I did with Max. I chose to keep him intact at least until his growth plates closed, after he turned two. But that plan, along with so many others, was derailed by Covid. In the intervening years, I’ve continued to read and debate this issue – and it always comes back to, “do I want to chance cancer?” I know, he’s a Golden, he’s already at risk but why increase that risk if I don’t have to?

Also, he’s so totally Maverick – he is such a large personality, he brings the party, then dances on the table wearing the lampshade on his head while telling terrible jokes that crack you up everywhere he goes. It drives me crazy sometimes, but I wouldn’t change him for anything. I don’t want to take that chance either.

And I’m stubborn. So the more people tell me I need to neuter him, the harder I dig in my heels. This charming trait was why I questioned Covid so early, refused to wear a mask after bowing my neck for a few weeks, still remain unvaxed, and am generally a “prove it” kinda gal. So If you’re gonna tell me that taking a chance on my dog getting cancer, exacerbating any behavior problems (which are training problems, for the most part) and will generally make life better, my response will be “prove it” and I’ll start showing you evidence of the exact opposite.

Also – it’s actually really funny when people get all indignant and tell me “you need to get him fixed!” My response is that he’s close to perfect and doesn’t need fixing, thanks.

My favorite story is about the random woman at the park who glared at me and demanded, “why isn’t your dog neutered!?” My response? “Why are you looking at my dog’s ass?” He’s a Golden, you can’t see his parts unless you’re looking!

You may disagree with me on this, but any nasty comments will not be approved.

Posted in dogs, Maverick, Max, memories, puppies, training | Tagged , , , , , | 13 Comments